The hurrier I go the behinder I get

When I was growing up, my grandma had a sign hanging in her kitchen, it said, 'The hurrier I go the behinder I get'. It used to confuse me so much and I'd ask my grandma what it meant and she'd say, sometimes going to fast will slow you down. I'd get even more confused!  But grandma you can't go fast and still be slow,,,,anyways, that memory popped on my head today as I pushed Georgia's feed in a bit faster than usual because I had somewhere to be. She ended up refluxing and we were an hour late leaving the house. It was a lesson I can relate to so many aspects of raising her. I want to push her so hard.  Push more calories, more ounces, more therapies, more doctors, more tummy time. Why?  Because I want her to do everything else on time, normally,,,to prove she's normal, nothing's wrong.   She needs to hit all her milestones because she didn't hit the first & most important one,,,,eating. 

Everytime her nurse comes, she tells me, "remember, Georgia does everything on her own time". It's so true. She's always waited until we're all worried before she just decides to do something. I need to slow down, enjoy her and let her grow and develop. It seems like when i try and push her, she regresses. She's proven us all wrong up to this point and I have more faith now than ever that she's going to eat,,,when she decides to ;)

This is probably the most honest post I've ever written. I just want to clarify, if there proves to be something wrong and she doesn't hit her milestones I'm okay with that. Just having an undiagnosed child with an uncertain future weighs heavy on your mind. If she skips other major milestones we are looking at a very serious issue. It's hard to deal with that threat, when you don't know what it will look like. So this post is about needing to enjoy who Georgia is, not try to push her to be what I want her to be.